lonely and desperate

What’s the possibility of being friends with an ex after you break up with her? It’s one of the most common questions in a breakup, and the answer is often, but not always, yes. Of course, being friends with your ex means the possibility remains open that you might get back together, but this cannot be the reason to be friends. Once the relationship’s been dissolved, how do you go about being friends? These five tips will help.

Being Friends With an Ex Tip #1: You must start putting your lives together as single people, and that includes forgiving each other. How can you be friends with someone if you’re nursing a grudge against her? “Moving on” means just that - leaving the past in the past and concentrating on today - and tomorrow. The future’s very big - there’s no reason to keep concentrating on the failures of the past. Bringing up the past will do no good, and will probably do a great deal of harm.

Being Friends With an Ex Tip#2: There’s no more romance - that’s a fact.  You’ve got to accept it. The days of her being your girlfriend are over, they’re in the past. You’ve got to let the relationship go completely and accept the fact that the most you can be with her is “just friends.” See, the real reason most guys agree to be “just friends” after a breakup is that they think that they’ll eventually reconcile. You have to drop any pretense of a romantic relationship is you’re going to make a friendly relationship work, and by all means, don’t get jealous when you see her with another man! How would you feel, for example, if she got jealous when she saw you with another woman?

Being Friends With an Ex Tip# 3: Relax and let time go by. Healing takes time! Now this is a critical point: if she doesn’t want to be friends, you must honor your ex’s wishes. Remember that she’s hurting too.  There’s a good chance she’ll change her mind after she’s gotten over some of her pain. Frankly, it’d be tough, immediately after a breakup, to have a friendship with your ex. Here’s an important point: make certain that you’re over the pain before you start trying to establish a friendship with her.

Being Friends With an Ex Tip#4: Don’t try to communicate with her all the time. “Just friends” don’t call and text each other all the time. You’d wind up looking fairly desperate, and that won’t encourage her to keep up a friendship with you. You may be telling yourself that calling and texting her all the time is bringing the two of you closer.  If that’s the case, you’re lying to yourself. I know it’s tough, especially in the early stages, but keep your distance.  Call her now and then, and text her from time to time, but keep if low-key!

Being Friends With an Ex Tip#5: Finally, treat he like a friend, the way you treat your other friends. She doesn’t need special attention or gifts or flowers. Treat her the same way you treat other female friends. Make sure that you don’t give her any sort of special treatment or act like she’s any different from one of your other friends or you run the risk of creating an awkward and uncomfortable situation.

Remember this important point - if you try to become friends just to keep alive the hope of re-establishing your romance, you’ll never get over her. If you manage to become good friends, that’s great! She’s still the same person you were attracted to in the first place. Your life is the most important thing for you to deal with, though, and if it works out that she’s not going to be part of it, either as a girlfriend or friend, accept it and move on. If it’s not to be, it’s not to be. You know that you can live well without her in your life.  Look forward to whatever life has in store and be happy!

If you found this article helpful and you’ve like to learn more ways to stay friends after a break up, be sure to check out my website Get Back My Girlfriend where I’ll show you tons of tips and tricks to help you deal with your breakup, manage with a broken heart, or even get back together with your ex.

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