lonely and desperate

There’s nothing good about jealousy. Jealousy is a negative trait and can destroy an otherwise good relationship. If you tend toward jealousy you need to learn how to overcome jealousy before your relationship falls victim to the green eyed monster.

I’ve been looking into this problem quite a bit and I found good advice on web-pages like How to Overcome Jealousy. Here’s some of what I’ve learned.

To begin, why do you think your jealous? What are your excuses? This will require honest self-examination.

No one has to be jealous. Jealousy is a choice. Being jealous is like other ways of being in the world - It’s under our control. It may be more comfortable to blame external circumstances for the way you are, but that’s a cop-out. A mature person accepts responsibility for the choices they’ve made.

There many reasons a person may choose to experience jealousy. A common one is insecurity.

Related to that is a fear of being cheated on. But being jealous and accusatory and monitoring your partners every move will drive them away rather than bring them closer.

For some people expressing jealousy is a way to get power and control. They place all kinds of limitations and demands on their partner as a way of exerting control. Again over the long-term this is likely to damage the relationship.

To go back to a recurring theme, we do have a choice. If we make different choices, we’ll get different outcomes. Which you think is most likely to get a positive result - acting in a controlling, jealous manner or approach and your partner with love trust and respect?

If you continuously treat someone with distrust and try to control every aspect of their life, they may try to acquiesced you wishes out of a sense of obligation but they’re unlikely to respond joyfully and with love. I think you can see how this creates the opposite of what jealous person desires.

There’s no doubt that relationships are complex and most people could manage them more elegantly than they do. In an ideal world, learning relationship skills would be part of growing up, but it isn’t. Most of us are learning by trial and error.

As I discovered when I was researching jealousy, you do have a lot of relationship information available these days.

An excellent site devoted to all aspects of relationships is The Relationship Fix.

If you’re in a serious relationship (or for that matter, even if you just think you’ld like to be in one someday) I highly recommend you check out the Save My Marriage Today Premium Home Study Course Review.

Based on that review, I got the course. even though the title says “Save My Marriage”,the course would help any long-term relationship. Anyone who goes through this program will have much better relationships than 90% of the population.

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